Entertainment

We Can Tell You What Your Abuela Makes You For Breakfast Based On Her Zodiac Sign

Abuelas are universally loved by all Latinos lucky enough to grow up with them. Virtually all of them make the most delicious food we’ve ever tasted. They all kiss you on the cheek and call you gordita as you walk in the door, and if you try and reject your second helping of food, they call you flaquita and give you more. Of course, our abuelas offer so much more than just food. They likely left their generations-long home country to give their descendants a different start in life. They’re trailblazers and all so unique.

Pero, like, when it comes to desayuno, one thing is certain: they will cook up a feast. Here’s how the stars have influenced their breakfast of choice. See if we guessed right.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

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There’s no recipe for this one. It’s just a straight mixto de cositas leftover and somehow, your Abuela makes it work. It’s the talent of the Aries to go with the flow and make casamiento out of nothing (air).

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

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Mama, you’re having whatever it is your abuelita has had for breakfast every day for the last half century. Taurus’ abuelas are all about security and comfort, and they make that feeling contagious with Huevos Rancheros. 

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

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We bet your abuela is either a genius in the kitchen or just plain wrong. Gemini’s are known for being on the pulse of trends and creative. Your abuela probably thinks she invented the Jibarito. 

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

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Cancers are super nostalgic and probably have the deepest emotional connection to food out of any of the other signs in the zodiac. Your abuela makes you what her abuela made her for breakfast, and she tells you that every single time. ❤️The answer to this depends on your abuela’s nationality, but we’re going to guess some kind of yucca (or plantain) with frijoles and leftover pegao. Maybe an egg if you’re lucky.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

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Leos make for very fun, generous abuelas. We bet your abuela actually asks you what you want for breakfast, and will actually make you pancakes if you ask. Claro, she’s using Bisquick [beez-kwhick], and adding diced mangos, but you love her for it.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

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Our reliable Virgo abuelas love a neat egg-in-the-hole. Is there any other name for it? It’s the best way to use stale bread while making a super satisfying breakfast cada vez.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

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Resourceful Nana’s are going to make you the most simple and pure breakfasts of all time: Huevo con Arroz Blanca. It’s the cheapest meal to make using anoche’s leftover rice and a runny egg, and it satisfies

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

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Scorpio abuelas are so meta, they would make their nenas an egg-in-the-hole jamón style. At the very least, she’s making these for her grandsons because they’re growing boys. Us granddaughters might be stuck with the buttery bread version and it’s patriachy’s loss.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

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Sagittarius abuelas are a rarity because the sign breeds folks who are here for a good time, not a long time. Your abuela has stories and she’s going to tell you every single one of them as she mashes together some mangú.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

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Capricorn abuelas want to adore you with a masterpiece of thrifty ingredients made rico with love and care. Molletes: it’s what’s for breakfast. 🤤

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

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Your Aquarius abuela is in her most evolved state when she feels she’s tapped into the world around her. She might be trying to make substitute classic mantequilla with a non-dairy butter, or try out soyrizo. We’re not mad about it.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

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Honey, there’s no telling what your Pisces abuela is going to do this morning. She might just skip breakfast to go tend to her garden, or meet with her new social club. You’re taking her out para desayunar. 😂

22 Facts About Geminis Since It Is That Time Of The Season

Culture

22 Facts About Geminis Since It Is That Time Of The Season

It’s that time of the year for Gemini babes to shine! But if you’re a Gemini, then you probably knew this already. And sure, it’s all well and good to know that you’re one fantastic Gemini babe, but are you a Gemini expert? Test your Gemini knowledge, and read our 22 facts below to see how much you know about being a Gemini.

1. You’re born between the 21st of May and the 20th of June.

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We’ll start with the basics. If you’re a Gemini, then you’re born sometime between the 21st of May, and the 20th of June, inclusive. So Gemini babes, remember this next time you’re at a party – you never know, you might be able to pick a fellow Gemini from their birthday!

2. Your ruling planet is Mercury.

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Mercury was named for the ancient Roman god of messengers, who rules over communication, writing, and movement. Gemini, if you’re wondering why you’re so good at talking the ear off the person next to you, wonder no longer! You were born to chat. 

3. Geminis are expressive and quick-witted.

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Communication isn’t just limited to talking. Geminis thrive off being active in a conversation, and that involves listening, too! And, in your case, being a bit of a joker. You’re the personification of a social butterfly. You draw energy from being around people, and that’s why most know you as an extrovert.

4. But, Geminis also have a serious side.

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As the sign of the twin, Geminis can go from being bright and breezy, to serious, thoughtful, and restless. With your two very opposite sides, sometimes people can’t make head or tails of you.

5. Your curiosity makes you want to explore.

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But what do you want to explore? The possibilities are endless! Maybe you want to travel, talk about ideas, discover a new culture – Geminis are absolutely fascinated by the world. And so, you forever feel like there’s just not enough time to experience everything that you want to experience.

6. You’re forever searching for your other half.

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Another part of being the sign of the twin is this constant feeling that your other half is missing. This isn’t just in a romantic way, either. You seek new friends, mentors, and colleagues to bring out the best in you – and you in them.

7. You value a deep connection.

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If anyone is lucky enough to get really close to you, they’ve found themselves a true friend. A Gemini like you sticks around, through thick and thin. That being said, you are guilty of sometimes stretching yourself a little too thin when it comes to making friends, and so you have plenty of acquaintances, too.

8. Yellow and green are a Gemini’s lucky colors.

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Wearing yellow and green can bring a Gemini luck! Beyond colors, your lucky numbers are three and five, and your lucky days are Wednesday and Thursday. 

9. You’re compatible with four other star signs.

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Love and friendship comes most easily to you with Aries, Leo, Libra, and Aquarius. Of course, your connection to Libra and Aquarius isn’t really that much of a surprise – they are also air signs, like you, Gemini! Air signs generally have light and breezy attitudes, meaning that you all get along like a house on fire. 

10. But, Geminis are least compatible with two-star signs.

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It might be wise to steer clear of Virgo and Pisces, Gemini. With Virgo’s penchant for perfectionism, and Pisces intense, emotional soul, they may be a bit much for your light-heartedness. Chances are, you’ll probably grind their gears, too.

11. Geminis mostly want fun from love and sex.

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You’re always up for an intellectual challenge, and the easiest way to your heart is through stimulating conversation. You need to know that someone’s just as good with words as they are in bed.

12. You may find it hard to settle down.

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Since Geminis are all about movement, it means that when you jump into the dating pool, you may not be so keen on getting into people’s baggage. That being said, when you find The One, you’ll happily invest everything you have in the relationship.

13. Geminis get along well with children.

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Is it your friendliness that makes the little ones want to be around you? Or is it the fact that you understand that kids just need to narrate everything they do? Who knows. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re great with children.

14. You tend to avoid taking on responsibility.

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Especially in the home. After all, who really wants to be domestic, and waste time doing the laundry, and vacuuming, andpaying bills, and watering plants, and making beds, and tidying up, when there are so many other exciting things to do?

15. The best career path for you involves your brainpower.

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You like it best when your job engages with your smarts – and it’s even better if you spend your days multitasking and working with other people! Geminis generally suit being a trader, artist, inventor, writer, orator, preacher, journalist or lawyer.

16. Geminis are bad with money.

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But as far as you’re concerned, really, you’re pretty excellent with money. After all, why earn it if you’re not going to spend it? Money is a necessary evil for you, since in the wise words of Homer Simpson, “money can be exchanged for goods and services”. Or in your case, take you on your next adventure.

17. People love how flexible you are.

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As a rule, Geminis tend to be pretty open-minded and easy-going. Sometimes your versatility influences your love life, too, which can make you a really interesting babe in bed.

18. Enthusiasm is your middle name.

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Okay, maybe it’s not literally your middle name. But, it may as well be – your enthusiasm is always infectious, and it definitely makes you the life of the party! Everyone knows it’s going to be a wild time once you start drinking since a tipsy Gemini is an up-for-anything Gemini. 

19. Geminis suck at making decisions.

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Because you have this innate ability to think about different perspectives in every situation, you’re always of two minds about something. Remember: it always helps if you weigh up the pros and cons of your decisions!

20. You can’t resist gossip.

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For you, gossip isn’t about going on a power trip. You just really love the thrill of spilled tea – probably because if you were really honest with yourself, you can be a bit nosy sometimes.

21. You have two flowers associated with your sign.

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Lavender and Lily of the Valley are considered Gemini flowers. 

22. As a Gemini, you share your sign with a pretty eclectic group of celebrities.

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The list includes people like Donald Trump, Kanye West, Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, Prince, Paul McCartney, Marilyn Monroe, Serena Williams, Morgan Freeman, and Bob Dylan!

Were there any Gemini traits that surprised you? Let us know what you think on Facebook by clicking the icon at the top of the page!

It’s Leo Season: Here’s How You’ll Go Broke Based Off Your Zodiac Sign

Entertainment

It’s Leo Season: Here’s How You’ll Go Broke Based Off Your Zodiac Sign

Praise be, with mercury’s retrograde behind us, we’re looking straight ahead to celebrating Leo in all its fiery glory. The retrograde has just rained twelve levels of emotional basura down upon us and Leo is going to burn it all up. We’re stepping out of the depths of emotional mierda and letting our strange selves be set free, thanks to Leo.

We’re here for all the self-care our hearts need, and after such a trying month behind us, and indulgent Leo egging us on, we’re all about to go broke. Here’s how you will.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

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We’re feeling turned around after Mercury in retrograde and want to feel safe again. Taurus, you might be feeling like now’s the time to invest in that home security system and you’re right.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

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Virgo, we know that by telling you this, you’re going to feel obligated to buy it, but that’s the point. You would need to buy this Ezy Dog $99 seatbelt harness for your dog because you know it’s the only crash tested harness that will actually protect your baby in the case of an emergency. Earth signs, we’re here for security.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

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All the earth signs are going to be looking for ways to ground themselves, especially after the chaos of yester-season. My fellow Capricorns, we are laughably practical in how we spend our money, but it speaks to what makes us feel good–by grounding into the earth. I already bought four pair of shoes this week, hbu?

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

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Leo has you feeling ready to create the life you’ve always wanted to have. You’ve had an international trip on your mind, and you know what, there’s no time like the present. Pull the trigger and buy that flight to Colombia, girl.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

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Feliz cumple, Leo! This your time to shine, and the stars are making it so that you get the most bang for your buck. Throw yourself that party. Go on that weekend cruise. Celebrate every version of yourself you’ve brought to your birthdays and toast to next year’s.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

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Sagittarius, you’re such a giving soul, and Leo just brings out the extravagance of generosity in you. You’ve wanted to take your mama back to Cuba for a minute. Do it.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

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For you, dear Cancer, indulgence is best spent shared. You’re on the verge of going broke to share an emotional connection and special memory with your partner. 

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

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It may sound too on-the-nose, Scorpio, but both you and Capricorn are feeling the kink in the air. We don’t need to tell you to be sex-positive. We’re just giving you a heads up that you about to go broke on a sex toy subscription box. : P 

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

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Sweet Pisces, your heart is so full this Leo season, and only you could offer the love and care a special needs animal requires. We think you’re about to go broke paying medical bills for that special three-legged turtle in your life.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

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Gemini, this season could go one of two ways. You’re either about to drop money on a couple kegs and throw a party, or this political season has you wanting to invest in the future. If it’s the latter, may we suggest the Trans Latina Coalition because you know justice is intersectional and trans Latina immigrants are at high risk.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

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Dear Libra, this season, Leo won’t have you stray too far from what you know. Libra would go broke buying VIP tickets to the work convention they’ve always needed to elevate their networking game.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Credit: c.b.m.astronomy / Instagram
@c.b.m.astronomy / Instagram

Aquarius, there’s no doubt about it. You’re going to invest in the stars by actually buying one and naming it after yourself. 😂

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